Grateful

Living in a first world country and in the bubble that is central Austin, it is really difficult at times to be cognizant of just how extremely lucky most of us are and to take time out to be grateful for all the things, people and experiences in our lives.  If you aren't living in a part of the world where your next meal may not come for days or where your life is in danger every minute of the day, ironically, it takes real effort to make time in your day to stop and just be grateful.  I guess the first thing we should be grateful for is the fact that we even have the luxury of not having time to be grateful!  So, I could go through a litany of things, people and experiences that I am grateful for, but since this blog is about running, I will try to focus on that today.  I was supposed to be heading out to Big Bend this weekend for the 50K race they have out there every year.  It is a super fun weekend with great friends, lots of laughs, much drinking, and a beautiful course through the enormous and beautiful Big Bend park  (admittedly rather than relishing the moments last year, I spent the vast majority of my time on the course being obsessively paranoid about mountain lions).  I wasn't ready to "race" the 50K this year, but I wanted to show up to stay "consistent" with my commitment and to see some really great (and HILARIOUS) friends who all go out to run this race.  About mid-week my husband got super busy at work and it just didn't look like the 8-10 hour drive (depending on how much law breaking we were going to be doing) was going to happen.  I have to admit, I was a little bummed although feeling a little less anxious about all the planning and arranging that goes into leaving 3 kids for 4 days too - total mixed bag.  I was telling one of my very best girlfriends about the change of plans and that I would just run with my usual crew on Saturday to get a semi-long run in, finishing out Week 3 with around 50 miles.  Her response:  "You are are very lucky your legs allow you to do that kind of mileage; my legs would hate me."  She's right, I am very lucky, not just that I can go from low mileage to some relatively decent mileage, but that I can (meaning I am ABLE) to run at all.  I saw a woman on the trail today with a prosthetic leg.  She was out there getting it done like a BOSS!  So, today, I am taking a few minutes out of my morning to truly be grateful for the gifts of today -  I am grateful for the fact that I didn't have to wake up at 4am to run long this morning; that I had 2 funny, story-telling friends to entertain me for a little over 15 miles this morning; that the sun was shinning and the weather was ridiculously gorgeous; that I will spend time with my husband today (alone - a rarity!); that I have a mother that is young and energetic enough to take care of 3 kids while I spend time with my husband; and for the fact that I have the luxury of sitting here with my coffee taking a few minutes out of my day to even think about these things...

                                          The Guys - Big Bend 50K - January 2013

Balance - An Urban Myth

For at least the last two decades (maybe more) we have seen this concept of finding "balance" bounced around - mainly by and directed to women, but that's not what I am focusing on here.  As the theory goes, with the right amount of balance in your life you can not only have it ALL, but can be happy while you are having it all.  I have always thought this was just plain ridiculous and still do.  Talk about unrealistic goals!  In the world of balance, I should be able to commit to a consistent running program, meet my nutrition goals, be a competent and successful attorney, be a loving wife, great friend, wonderful cook, raise children who will go out into the world and make it a better place and serve my community -- all I need to do is figure out how to "balance" these interests daily, weekly, monthly, yearly -- problem solved!  As if each of these things can be broken up on a scale in a magical and equitable way so that the scale is perfectly centered.  Because at the end of the day what we really mean by "balance" is equality.  If I work all day, I need to find equal time with my children and husband that very same day.  If I go for a 2 hour run and go into work late, then I need to stay 2 hours later to make that up.  Otherwise, the "balance" in our life disappears and we have failed in some way.  Unfortunately, life is not that neat and tidy.  If you have a client call you at 4pm who needs something the next day, you may have to forgo dinner with your family or your after work run to get that project done.  If you have a newborn baby, good luck keeping all your balls equitably flying in the air.  I fully recognized the year that I ran so much that I was LUCKY to have the opportunity to commit to something that big.  I was in a "due diligence" phase of starting my own practice, my children were small enough that they didn't even realize I ran at all (in fact on my Mother's Day card that year my children listed my hobbies as: napping and eating Kit Kats...nice), getting up at obscene hours of the morning (I met a friend at 1am to run 30 miles before he went to work once) didn't bug me because I didn't have to be "on" by any certain time of the day and I had a group of other nutty people who were doing the very same thing.  After I ran Leadville, I put 100% of the energy that I had put into running for the last several years (particularly that year) into starting my own law practice.  There was no "balance" in either of these situations, but that was o.k.  Sometimes laser focus serves us well - we shouldn't feel bad about it.  Week 3 of trying to stay "consistent" with a traveling husband and so many other obligations has really brought this to the forefront for me.  I will worry less about balance and more about trying to be great at a few things and be alright with just getting by with the others....those things that take center stage will change from week to week, month to month and year to year...that's where you find the balance.

Awesomeness!

So, a friend of mine sent around an email at the beginning of the year that was essentially about taking time out while you are experiencing something really cool (like for instance running through the largest ditch on earth, otherwise known as the Grand Canyon) to recognize how "awesome" that experience is while you are actually in it.  How rare is it that any of us EVER take time to do that?  No matter what we are doing  - running, working, spending time with friends, cleaning house, eating, drinking, you name it...chances are, we are all thinking about what's coming next.  What we need to do next, what we want to do next, what we have to do next....It's so easy to live in the future rather than the present.  I know this is one of my personal flaws.  I can't make it through the first 2 minutes of my day (that's probably a generous estimate) before I have the entire next 12 hours (minimum) planned out methodically in my head.  What would it be like to just wake up and actually think about how good my coffee smells and tastes?  Or actually talk to my children during breakfast rather than multitasking to get to the next thing to get them out of the door to school?  To go for a run and NOT be planning the rest of the runs for the week, month, year?  It would be AWESOME...so that is why I am adopting my friend's mantra and making this the year of Awesomeness (and consistency of course)!  I plan to be awesome by being present (as much as is humanly possible for me (remember setting reachable goals is key) - I have had 39 years of type-A behaviors and have a bit of OCD) and in finding something awesome no matter what the circumstances.  

                                               Top of Mount Elbert (14,400 Feet)

                                                       June 2011 - Awesomeness!

                                    

Sometimes Fate Intervenes

Lethargic, grumpy, exhausted from a long week and weekend of sick kids, a busy social calendar and work....these are the feelings I had when I woke up this morning.  Immediately I began my plot to ditch my run.  I slowly made it through the morning routine of preparing a hot breakfast for kids, making lunches, getting them out of the door for school and answering a few work emails, and then I had to decide - was I going to go for my run or not? Technically, according to my own self-imposed plan, I only have to run 5 days a week.  Maybe this should just be my day off since I have ZERO pep in my step and I have an extremely busy day ahead of me (these are of course all the reasons you should run and you should make that run happen in the early morning hours in the dark before you have time to go through this rationalizing process - otherwise known as bailing).  I decided on middle ground, packed a bag with clothes (just in case) and headed to the office.  I was planning on skipping lunch since I was about 99.9% sure I was never going to use that gym bag today, but then it occurred to me that I should go to Whole Foods and find a "magic pill" for the mood that I was in.  After all, Whole Foods has everything, I was sure there was some supplement for "super cranky, lethargic, exhausted women" - all I needed to do was go look.  I have heard on more than one occasion from friends how much they hate Whole Foods - mainly because they can never find parking.  I have always, always been able to find parking, no matter when I go (weekends, weekdays, lunch time, off times, etc.) and not only parking, but good parking.  So, today in the aforementioned mood that I was in, it was only appropriate that I circled the parking garage and found NO parking!  With crankiness jacked up about 100% at this point, I decided I would circle one more time and if I didn't find any parking, I guess I would be forced to go to the gym - since it was less than a block away.  Well, as the fates would have it, no parking second time around.  So, whether I wanted to or not, I ended up in my workout clothes at the gym at the end of it all.  Did I get a run in today - No.  But, I did get off of my butt and do something and when I was done, I was in a much, much better mood even without the "magic pill."

The Juice Cleanse

Even though they have been around for a long time, this year seems to be the year of the Juice Cleanse!  It seems like everyone I know is either on it, was on it or is getting on it!  That includes me….I have been one of the many clients on more than one occasion, most recently after the Christmas holiday when my skinny jeans looked more like "jeggings" than actual jeans after indulging too much in wine and food and yes, not running.  Let me clarify at the outset that I am not a nutritionist, do not play one on t.v., have zero credentials in the area of health and nutrition…I am an attorney, which in no way qualifies me to have an opinion on this topic, but maybe because I am attorney I do!  

So, back to the post-Christmas tight-fitting jeans drama….why wouldn't you try it?  "Jump start" your system…….lose 5 pounds instantly....and the best part....you are encouraged NOT to exercise because you won't have enough energy!  Little work - lots of reward!  Sign me up!  So, a few days after Christmas, in desperation, I got online and signed up for another juice cleanse.  The next day, I picked up my $200 worth of "fresh cold pressed juice" (I love the way we have come up with such a fancy and exclusive way to say - hey, we squeezed some oranges in a bottle a few hours ago) -- 18 bottles to be exact.  As I started home it occurred to me that I didn't actually look at the nutritional content on the bottles of this particular cleanse.  What I was most interested in was the sugar content, because knowing me and my commitment issues, I would be using this juice as a supplement in less than 24 hours.  Yes, I should have done my due diligence prior to buying $200 worth of juice, but desperation leads to bad results.  Anyway, when I did get around to researching the nutritional values, I found out that each of the bottles had over 20 grams of sugar in them (that's over 120 grams of sugar a day for 3 days!!).  That's A LOT of sugar -- way over the recommended amount and way too much if you are using the juice as a "supplement" (now , I don't want all the actual nutritionists reading this to go nuts...I get that this is at least not processed sugar, so in some way better for me, but either way you slice it - 120 grams is too much).  The caloric intake for each bottle was between 110-130 calories, so basically if you only drink the juice you are limiting your calories to around 660 calories a day.  Of course you will lose weight!  You could accomplish the same results with one Big Mac a day at 700 calories.  In fact, a man just lost 37 pounds and lowered his cholesterol after eating McDonald's for 90 days! (www.kcci.com/news/central-iowa/science-teacher-creates-documentary-based-on-mcdonalds-diet/-/9357080/23750942/-/w7swjt/-/index.html) Again, I'm not advocating you eat McDonald's everyday and I'm not saying there is no value in a juice cleanse or drinking some fancy "cold pressed juice."  It's just not the "magic" bullet that we all want it (maybe need it) to be.  With this information in hand, I decided that I wasn't up for another go at the juice cleanse.  Plus, I really wasn't interested in giving up my coffee for three days either.....and yes, I've read caffeine is the number one drug in America - I'm ok with that, let's solve one problem at a time.  Now, the real issue became, what to do with all of this juice?!?  I convinced my husband it was good for him (he's super thin and fit so a little extra sugar wouldn't hurt him a bit), traded my kids a few juices for their other sugary vices of the day and then froze the rest thinking that maybe someone would drink them eventually....

We are all looking for a fast, easy solution to meet our exercise/diet/weight loss goals.  In the words of a very good friend of mine, "stop those stupid fad diets and just run, the rest will take care of itself."  He's right, it always does.  There is no easy way out...make a commitment and "the rest will take care of itself."  

Friends - You Need Them!

Sometimes it's nice to turn up your tunes or just completely space out on a solo run, but I find it's much easier to make it through your workout with friends.  I was thrilled to have the company of two of my friends on my run this morning...both very talented ultra-runners.  My goal was to keep them talking so that I could manage my breathing around the 7 mile loop.  I have ran with the same group of people since 2010 (and some longer than that) - these guys are hardcore.  They all regularly run 50-100 mile races and they have managed to stay "consistent" throughout the time that I have known them.  They are not only great people, they are also all really great runners.  It has always been my school of thought that if you want to be a better runner (whatever that means for you: faster, longer, etc.) then run with people who are better runners than you.  If you don't have any friends who run, join a group.  It is definitely worth the expense -- you will meet friends, have people available 24/7 who are actually interested in things like PRs, nutrition, socks, best shoes, chaffing, etc., and more importantly you have accountability.  As I ran with my friends this morning I made my attempts to convince them that I was re-committed to showing up for our runs.  The sarcasm oozed out of their responses to me; but I get that - you have to EARN your way back into a group like mine.  I'm up for the challenge!  So, go call up your friends, make new friends or if all else fails - buy some by joining a group!  

                                                           Grand Canyon R2R2R 

                                        (sadly my buddies this morning not pictured here)

The Bargaining Begins!

Wow, that didn't take long!  The bargaining began even earlier than expected this time around...when my alarm went off this morning, I looked at my phone - 23 degrees....while moderate for some, I'm a native Texan and that is just flipping cold in my book....maybe I should run later in the day, surely it will warm up?  Turn on the news and hear "highs in the 30s"....so much for that idea.  So, the weather was one reason I should not hit the trail today, I am sure there are some other really good reasons...let's see, my husband is in balmy South America hunting, so I need to get three kids up, dressed, fed, lunches packed and all to school in time (he usually handles the drop off in the mornings) for the first day back after a two week break (they will be fun to wake up), I have several work deadlines looming, I know my phone will be ringing off the hook since it's the first full week of the new year, I need to go to the bank and again, it's really, really, really cold.  Those all seem like well thought out reasons to bail today.  I'm still running through this list as I go through the motions this morning and finally decide to at least put my running clothes on for school drop off.  On the way to school, in my super warm car, drinking my super warm coffee, my 7 year old daughter says, "Mom, do you think I should go to riding lessons tonight since it's so cold?"  Secretly I want her to say she doesn't want to go, then I don't have to sit outside in the cold for 2 hours and also manage two 8 year old boys who are complaining for 2 hours about the cold and having to watch their sister ride horses...but I say, "That's up to you, what do you think?"  "Yeah, I'm going to go.  You know, I'm addicted to riding, Mom."  In that instant it seemed clear...of course I was going to go get my run in this morning regardless of all the other reason why I shouldn't.  In a split second, my daughter reminded me that you have to not only be committed to do something, but passionate about what you are committed to do.  I spent most of 2009 doing marathon training in the cold and rain - it never once occurred to me to skip a workout.  So, with a windshield of between 9-15 degrees this morning, I slowly made my way around the 7 mile loop and tried to rekindle my passion.